The phone that never changed anything...

This is dedicated to all of the fans ( and fanatics ) around, that really struggle to make a decision over which smart phone to buy, every single time we read some article about “ XXX  will be released September 27…)

With no second thoughts, the 3 most important products that hit us, are  Apple, Samsung and HTC; Nokia, Sony and few others trailing in the rivalry

I am not a fan( or fanatic), that will drive to the store, and wait in the queue even before the sunrise, with a hot cup of coffee, dressed in my night clothes, to present myself to be a proud owner of Apple on Facebook. I am just another customer, who would walk to the store, the following day and test every device that is on the table ( even though they are all black or white and look like sinister twins )

For some reason, a smart phone has turned so obvious, to impalpably tell us that “smart phones are for dumb people “ ; a fact which we arguably refute.

Apple ( and a few others), merely out of familiarity trying to breed monopoly around. To me, it feels like, the moment a product or a service loses its purpose, it is merely luxury.

iPhone to me is luxury; They may have scores of reasons to prove their point. But, iPhone is a phone, if you need something more; don’t buy it.

Apple had raised its bars on innovation and product service to a much higher level, that today, I cannot admit a device like iPhone5. I have to agree, when my wife kept telling me, before I left for the store. “ Don’t raise your hopes, and be disappointed ! “

You want my product, buy my accessories.

You want my service, stay in contract;

are not the reasons for any good product / service providers; it only stays to prove a non-belief in their products made and at some point, will be in the shelf.

To not beat around more, reasons why I think iPhone 5 may not be worth the buy

* Lack of Innovation

The Product Manager, “ Sir, these are the new features and designs for our totally revamped product “

The CEO, “ They will buy anyway, keep them all from the previous version. We will look at it next year. Damn, this Steve ( Jobs ) had to die just before he handed over the new design !

* Denial of product and service from experienced vendors ( like Google Maps ). It is simply a reinvention of the wheel

The Product Manager, “ What do we do ? “

The CEO, “ I hate Google, I love Patents, Haven’t you heard about cheap labor ? Do we go tomtom ?

* A faster processor, be it A6, A10, A20 means nothing to an average user

The Product Manager, “ Sir, we have this new A6 processor that will twice as fast “

The CEO, “ No, reprint all A5s to A6s, would you know, if it worked faster ? “

* A taller phone is not user friendly, just because Tim Cook / Steve Jobs or some designer has taller hands /fingers than wider hands

The Product Manager, “ Sir, this is our new design, this one will be 4 inches wide and a bit taller ? “

The CEO, “ Look at my hands ! Do I look like, I can hold a phone any wider than 3.5 inches ? “

But see, my fingers can reach all the way from the bottom to the top left corner icon on the screen !

* Myth: Taller and less wider phones are very user friendly

The Product Manager, “ Sir, we need a base for building the new product “

The CEO, “ Wait, I am busy watching Olympics “

The Product Manager, Sigh…

(5 Minutes Later)

The CEO, “ Eurekha ! I got it, let’s stick to Olympics. The slogan Citius, Altius, Fortius !

The Product Manager, “ I am sorry, I didn’t catch that “

The CEO “ Faster, Higher, Stronger “… in our case it is “ Faster, Taller, Stronger “

The Product Manager, Sigh, Sigh.. “ What about wider ? “

The CEO “ Don’t change history, we are people of the world. There is no such thing called wider, or an event in Olympics representing Wider “ !

iPhone 5 !

[The Olympics committee may probably sue apple for stealing their slogan]

The only other reason, I feel Apple products are in better demand is because of their supply and demand.

No one wants to couple Apple products with grey-market products, for fear of losing support and service. So, you buy a phone, you buy their earpods, and you buy iHome and now, you end up buying additional connectors just because they thought the connector proved old. To them, this is the earth shattering product innovation for iPhone 5.


My 4th day with iPhone ;)
Apple probably needs to grow-up in understanding that to some users, the look and feel ( it really doesn't matter to them whether it uses A6 or A5 or A10 ) is important too..
* The outer case made of aluminium is more prone to scuffing
* The lower charging end of black versions, wears out sooner
* Dust clogging will also be high near the speakers
* the white shiny Al casing, as you continue to use ( if you are sweating ), will cause stains and you will need to pamper it ;) . They are quite similar to the taps you use at home. The phone wont retain the classy look for 2 years.
* The abnormal increase in length without a compensating increase in width, definitely is a great move to account for finest display, but applications will not look too cool.
* Rumours that Apple may look for developers from Google, (apparently the ones that are frustrated with Google) hire them, and improve their Maps App
P.S : Are they planning to give out free goodies, viz., free cases, free connectors to keep the new iPhone users quiet until iPhone6 or ' the new iPhone ? '

As much I dislike iPhone 5, I don’t see great innovation or marketing move from other product companies.

There is no conclusion here or dislike for Apple products, I still will buy iPhone 5; not because I love it, but because I don’t have much preferences on my device. I don’t use it much anyway.

I just wrote what was in my mind…(at this very moment)

Common Hallucinations

Common Hallucinations (for people travelling for the 1^st time and for people who haven’t learnt during their 1^st time )

( What they don’t teach you….)

If I talk like them, they will probably think I am one of them or this man / girl is pretty good …

                It has taken me a million exasperating moment to be sitting on the call, to listen to someone faking the accent. As horrendous as it sounds, I have personally felt, I would walk right to them, put the phone on mute and swing them by the neck, like it happens in Cartoons between Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck ! ;) .

                What people, probably, are more interested to hear, is the content, than your accent or that fake style. Accept it, you didn’t even know about THIS accent, until you arrived here or before you watched the 9 AM – 11 PM HBO Movies !

If you do not understand something, accept it. A man who doesn’t know something for the 1st time remains a fool once; A man who doesn’t question remains a fool forever.

                This special someone asks a question on the call, that involved multiple people, nods his head for every single response, as the IBM person explained the process.

                I had a strange feeling about this and at the end of the call, I asked him, “So, what did they say? “ and I got the record response of all times. “I don’t know; they were speaking way too fast! “.

It is good to be a favorite, but…

I stop right here, to let you think. You can either rest on someone’s shoulder or stand on your feet. ;)

The empire you are on, right now, was built out of a great vision and an incredible thought process of a handful of radiant minds.

                Err…..You ne’er know who your next boss will be! ;)

Complaints, Regrets, Curses, Bad Feelings…

                As it may turn out, there is no ideal curve or happy hours always, between onshore/offshore folks.

 Onsite and offshore relationship is not like being in love, like Boys compromise for everything in the initial stages and girls compromise on everything in the later stages , before the break up !

It is like being in good agreement and relationship. As they say, Never go to bed mad; Stay up and fight!

Homeworks and Classy Works !

How many times have been sitting ( and swearing ) on a Vodafone, Airtel, ICICI Bank… customer service calls, where you had to wait for dog minutes to get your response?

Responses like…

“ Can you please wait sir, I am looking through my documentation ? “

“ Can you please hold, I am checking with my Manager ? “

“ I will be back in a moment sir ? “ …and you don’t hear for a few minutes, except that annoying music, which you loved when you called them for the first time ?

viz., Everyday I want to fly, stay by my side….Everyday I want to dream, stay by my side ;)

Never step into a conference call or meeting , without doing your homework.

If you don’t do your homework, there is no Classy Work !

Just to turn on your motivation, if you want your Ch*** to be happy on V’day, wouldn’t you try your best to do some chic work?

Hard Workers Vs Smart Workers

                Hard Workers, you may want to realize that if you continue to do the same things, yet expect different results, you are either crazy or you must be content.

                Smart Workers, you may want to realize that if you do too much of different things too often, you may want to realize that you are setting unrealistic expectations for everyone who is doing their best, around you.

Remember, the wheel of fortune is round..

They come once in 6 months, sometimes as some communications from our Leaders, who have struggled and lived through the ravages of time; people who made bigger decisions for your decisions today

When everything is Good, no one talks about it.

When everything is Bad, everyone wants to talk about it.

Savings is not about not spending. It is all about spending wisely.

                 It is a very common practice, for folks to do the conversion from USD to INR, during the first few days.

                “ This item costs $5 which means $5 * INR 50 = 250 ( $ or Ru ?! ) “ and you end up not eating for a few days outside. 

Solution ? Convert your income also into INR and you probably will feel better. J

Never take the advice of your half/empty head friends, who have bank accounts they do not want, credit cards they don’t want to have, buy stocks because they like the name, and have kids they don’t know about ;)

Good Days & Bad Days …

A perfect example of a Good Day.

                You, after being stung by that one strange species of spider, turn into spiderman the next morning.

A perfect example of a Bad Day.

                Imagine being that special species of spider and you accidentally run into a 2 year old, who is so interested to dissect your 8 legs, with no prior lab experience.

Rest, Relaxation and Sleep…

                Take a break from work and vacation, now and then. This will ease off your work tensions and heavy load.

                You don’t want to be that person in that rocking chair, with your grandson on your lap and he asks, “ Grandpa, you were in US for X years, where all did you go ? “ and the only answer you have for him is, “ I ….ahn.. saved a million dollars ! “.

Have a few good bedtime adventure stories to tell.

Didn’t you love them as a kid ?! ;)

Have fair knowledge of laws, practices, events, things around you…

                I remember eavesdropping ( or should I say Adam’s Dropping ?!! ), a conversation between a south asian ( I don’t want to sound a racist ! ) and a fellow American, who talked about insurance policies, claims & premiums and at the end of the conversation comes one great question, “ What is State Farm ? “

                I nearly fell off my chair….

If I act like them, they [the Americans / Europeans / Australians] probably will think I’m sooper cool dude…

                Never pretend to be someone who you are not.  Grabbing a drink and walking up to someone on the dance floor, doesn’t make you look cool.  

On the inside, you are still a Santhanam, Balakrishna or Johnny Lever ;)

                You will probably sound more like a telegraphic or a morse code machine, that goes tut-toot-tut..tut.. hic.. toot…tut..hic…hic… toot..tut…tut…

Learn the Alphas, Betas, Charlies, Deltas, Englands…

                Americans / Europeans / Australians have great obscurity with our serration of voice modulation and our ability to speak English in 2 different ways. 

We start with American but then end in British !

Be slow, steady and confident while you are in a call. It is okay, if he is from Greenland or from South Africa , and can say 95 words per minute!

[Trust me, I am not making this …]

                IBM person: Can you give me the program name?

                Developer: It is D….….M…..E...S..S..VBA

                IBM person: I beg your pardon?

                Developer:  D as in Dog, M as in Monkey, E as in Elephant…

Save some embarrassing moments…

Remember that some letters sound so ‘ alike ’ on the call.

*** I call them “ Twitters “ .

Letter A sounds like K, Letter S sounds like F, Letter M sounds like N, Letter D sounds like B…

Above all, remember that you are here for something, and regardless of wherever you come from, you have the greatest responsibility in representing the organization you work for.

Good Luck !!

*** Copyright for twitters, implicitly assumed! J , already part of my work.

               

The Longest 3 hours.

The day had finally come.

“Good Luck !”, I told him and hurried to the hall allocated to me.

He and I had been last bench buddies for all the coaching sessions for the entrance test to one of the prestigious colleges in India. We’d had our best times and worst. That’s immaterial. Let it rest. For later.

He quietly entered the hall, after leaving his books, cell phone outside and was just about to enter the hall, the invigilator said, “I suggest, you be on time young man. There is no next time for this qualifying examination, so I am letting you in “.

After displaying his ID card, the invigilator looks at him. “When was this taken? In your sixth standard?” he laughed and he could hear some hushed smiles around the room. He didn’t want to see.

“Come on. It’s me anyway.” All that he could find was this picture, that was already stuck on his school Id Card, which he carefully tore, taken about 2 years ago!

He muttered to himself, “What a jerk”! He refused not to look anywhere, anyone. The seat allocated to him was fifth from the front, right next to the window, facing the open farms. “What luck! Fresh Breeze for the next three hours, he told himself “.

“Quiet please! I want no sort of disturbance or noise in the hall for the next three hours. You start when this clock [pointing to the age old clock on the wall, above the green board] strikes 9:30 AM and you will stop when this clock strikes 12:30. Am I clear?” needless to say, the invigilator’s voice echoed around the hall.

He looked around. Boys and Girls, of varying sizes of head [ apparently, that is what you get to notice in top entrance exams like this one ], big, small, stepped, round, almost oval, oval, square, Mars attacks ‘ alien ‘ shaped, cute, injured with band aid. A hall of 61 people. Counting that big jerk, who head resembled more or less like the braying animal!

He closed his eyes in solemn prayer for about 30 seconds. He literally folded his hands and kissed the 2 fingers of his right hand, before he opened his NATRAJ geometry box [gifted to him in 1994 by his dad].

Question papers were quickly distributed at 09:25. The invigilator smiled as he walked past him and gave that little smile, which can never be assumed for whatever it must mean!

He opened the box that was filled with 3 pens, 3 pencils, 1 sharpener, 1 eraser, 1 ruler measuring 15 cms and the picture of his favorite God in the middle of the box, slightly torn and discolored due to ravages of time. But, there was something inside it too. A single strand of peacock feather with a few rice grains, his luck symbol, which he had been preserving since his pre-school days, believing it will grow someday.

He dropped his lucky Blue colored pen. Oh my God! BAD OMEN!!

He prayed again and opened the question paper. He eyes scanned through the entire question paper. He could not believe his eyes. He turned paranoid. He felt like that small kid in the movie ‘ Taare Zameen Par ‘. He believed now, that he suffered from a very rare but common disease…………. DYSLEXIA!

His hands failed to cooperate; his heart beat could now be heard loud enough that he felt people were staring at him.

He thumped hard on the bench and that reverberated like a sinusoidal wave of indestructible noise across the room that, everyone in the room felt, there was an earthquake.

One small fellow, in the extreme right corner of the room was literally holding the bench, papers and his geometry box so tight, lest they fall off.

The invigilator walked towards him. “Is everything alright, young man?”. He was now saying in a very soft tone. Our guy liked him now. How sympathetic this person is. Why did I ever call him a JERK? The Invigilator put his hands around his shoulder, comforting him. He knew something!

The Invigilator then walked away, to his chair and sat there meditating.

Now, he was looking at the question paper in total disbelief. Not because he didn’t not know the subject, but because he had appeared for the wrong paper! It was to be Chemistry today; it turned out to be Physics. The other paper was nearly 15 days away !

He hated Physics. He for once, felt that the earth had stopped moving for a second.

He dropped his pen and started thinking. He opened his box again, scurried through the box and took time to choose a pencil [ blue, green and red ]. He looked at the clock. It smiled and said , 9:47 AM. He chose the blue color pencil and placed his hands on the answer sheet, unconsciously pressing it so hard that the sharpened end of the pencil freed itself from the wooden part! “S%#$!!! “, he said. Loud, that it could be heard.

The girl sitting next to him, made a small movement. But, she resumed immediately. Damn, she knows the questions.. More than the questions, she knows the answers too! He cursed himself.

He pulled the sharpener out of his box and slowly started sharpening. Crrrrrr…crrrrr..crrrrrr.. The lead was sharp. He felt it, by piercing it in the cheek. Ouch, it hurt! Yeah…. It is sharp now!

He sat with his eyes toggling between the question and the answer paper. He slowly now drew a symbol on top of the paper, which is a sacred symbol for a good start. Pulled out his ruler and starting drawing margins. First page done. Then second page, then the third…. When he completed all the pages he looked up again. 10:01 AM.

May be the clock’s running too slow, he thought. He got up and asked the invigilator “Sir, Is that clock running? “. The entire hall was now looking at him, some with sheer accord while some others exasperated. The invigilator raised his head and told him, “Young Man! I see you have a left hand and that has something glowing like a wrist watch! , not working eh? “.

He sank. Dumb. How Dumb. How could he ever forget that he had a wrist watch? He looked at it. 10:02 AM. How, can it be that two isolated things, a clock and a watch, not run at the same time? Weird, he thought!

He reclined and lifted the question paper with both his hands. The paper had something very familiar about it. The paper looked as though it wasn’t printed in English! There must be a mistake; there surely must be a mistake. They must have distributed the wrong question paper!

He slyly chirped into the paper of the girl sitting next to him. PHYSICS. It read. She stunningly turned and hid her answer sheet. He pulled back and smiled. Huh? Girl, I wasn’t looking at you answer paper! How could he tell her that ? Then did a similar thing with the person sitting in front, PHYSICS. Huh, there surely is some mistake!

Gone. Now all gone. He looked at the clock. 10:35 AM.

He sat there sharpening and re-sharpening all the pencils. Crrrr.. Crrrr.. Crrr…. The size of each pencil was now less than half of what it had been, before he entered the hall!

He grew confident. Wow! That’s all what he needed now. He opened the question sheet again. Read and re-read the question. He had found a way out.

His left hand now shifted towards the answer sheet. He struck off the “ 1) “ that he had written earlier and marked “ Qns 1 “ this time. That’s something he needed. More confidence. He underlined it three times with his RED ball point pen, REYNOLDS, the world’s most preferred pen!

He started writing the first question from the question paper. He repeated this until all the questions were written neat and proper in the answer sheet. He properly underlined each question. In the end, felt a lot relaxed and happy. His heard beamed with pride. Yes, he had done it.

He now looked around. Some scratching their head, someone in front of him, was erasing the paper so badly, that it had made a black mark and it looked as though, he could see the bench below the paper ! “Ah, that is why you should buy NATRAJ PLASTO Eraser! It leaves no mark, when you erase”, he smiled to himself!

His eyes slowly wandered across the room, he suddenly felt a quick rush of breeze. He turned, the Window! It was open. For the first time in his life, he saw Nature, in its own natural and wild form.

Greenery, all around. Farms, Fields, Trees, Grasses, Cows. God is great, God is such a wonderful architect, and God is amazing. He declared. He visualized Jim Carrey standing on top of the Empire State building, screaming, “I am Bruce Almighty! My Will be done! “

He could see a small bicycle that was speeding across the nearby field. Kulfi Ice cream. How much he loved it. Ding. Ding. Ding. A faint sound of the bell, from the bicycle. His eyes followed until it reached the end of the window frame. Then….. It was gone!

He looked up again at the clock. 11: 32 AM.

He now focused on the candidates inside the hall. First bench, all guys. What a waste! Second bench. 2 Boys and 1 Girl. No. Third Bench. 3 Boys again. Hei, he is wearing a Black T shirt. Wow! What arms man ….. Is that a snake? A TATTOO. Amazing. How did he do that? Did it not pain? He concentrated and focused. Two snakes and a dragon. Amazingly carved in the left arm. “ I will get one done, when I leave this hall”, he decided.

Clock. 11: 43 AM.

The guy sitting far right corner, wearing a ‘ Hari Om’ T-Shirt, looked tattered and the guy had a very normal look. What a weird combination. Leather Chappels, Man. Complete disaster. What a bad taste for clothes! Girls prefer ONLY such guys, GOD knows why. Pretty looking girls with guys, who are a disaster. Hmmm…. [NOM]

He then finally found what he was looking for. The Angel. The girl of his dreams. She was in perfect robes. Everything about her was neat and perfect. PERFECT. He was admiring the way, she was holding the pencil and the way she was gnawing it between her lips. She thought for a second; then again back on paper, then in deep thoughts, again on paper. Such a heavenly sight. The way she put aside the flock of hair, he having rested his cheek over his harm, almost fell off now. Studious, SHE must be, he thought.

“Oh man, what am I doing?” He looked at the clock. 12:23 PM.

He began his countdown 120…119….118…117...116……. 5….4….3….2….1. “Young men, drop your pens please.. Ladies, I know you have already kept your word! “. The invigilator smiled. When the invigilator reached his seat, he was still staring at her. Then it happened, she looked back and smiled at him as if she knew that he was always doing that. A Woman’s instinct. That perhaps was the most heavenly moment of his life.

The invigilator now standing in front of him, blocking the view. He inclined hurriedly, insentience. He quickly realizing his stupidity let out a hangdog smile and handed over the answer sheet.

He ran towards the entrance, grabbed his bag and walked behind the Angel. “Beast behind the Beauty”, he roared within.

She turned around. “Hi!” she said. His felt surprised at the unexpected feat and whispered “Hi “! They walked….

She asked “So how was the paper? You have a big head; you must have done it well!! “

He said, “Oh yeah, I really struggled with the questions 2, 7, 15, and 21 “Otherwise, the paper was okay…., “he tried to act normal but still down to earth.

“Oh! Good for you, you brainy head, I could do only part of it. I wish you get through. Good then… Good Luck, see you around….. !!! “, and she left………

There he was…. Letting an Angel walk away… and he hadn’t come out of the first sigh, first love honeymoon.

Damn! I didn’t even get her email Id or her cell phone number. He cursed himself.

Little did he know that, she had really struggled and managed to write the question paper and all the questions, once more than him.

TWICE!

PAIN

Nothing gets more exciting, thrilling and fearsome than to remain on the other side of the door of the Operation theatre, with the RED BULB on.
You guessed it right, she was expecting a baby and he was expecting news.

37 Minutes ago…..

9:16 am.............THEN

With all the pain in her, he could see her biting her lips and he was holding her head, consoling her, telling her it’s going to be alright. He said it, but he wasn’t sure himself. He was scared. Very scared. Will she make it out of this? Will I see her again? Or will this be the last time ?

But he had to pretend strong, the usual way. Men’s worst fears are veiled by the pretense called courage. That’s the man’s strength and weakness.

The six feet stretcher kept streaming through that entire passage 3 metres wide. Patients, people, survivors, dead, injured all around him.

He seriously wouldn’t have expected it to happen today. The gynoec told him it was two days to go. How could she be wrong ? Blood oozing from his wife’s lips. Wipe it now? He didn’t know. These are the moments the brain fails to co-operate with the rest of the body. You know it, but can’t do anything.

She had clutched his hands too tight. He felt a heavy pain. He told himself, not worse then what she is going through.

He felt my fingers going numb. His legs kept moving in the direction of the operation theatre, His hands numb, His brain weaker, Eyes worried. But all these, his face would just not show. He kept smiling at her. It will be okay. It will be alright. He kept telling her. He repeated that again to himself.

She was looking at him. He didn’t know what was going through her mind. She continued. Was he supposed to ask her something? Does she want to say something? The noise that she let out was deafening for him.

“We are standing near the Niagara waterfalls now; the noise is so big that, even if hundred thousand motors were running, you still can’t hear them near this Waterfall… Now… Ladies, will you please be quiet so we can hear the lovely sound of the waterfall? “ ………..

His mind was racing….. A Man’s mind. Even if it is going through all pain, it still wouldn’t impede recollecting a very bad joke, from some old digest.

The white linen wrap over her was slipping; he had to hold the end of the stretcher so tight along with the bed sheet that it doesn’t slip.

His eyes quickly fell on the pretty nurse who was walking across the corridor with a tray full of strangely colored bottles. Fabulous she was. She is. She resembled his favorite actor. He remembered the day, he lied to his wife, going out with his buddies for her movie, reached around 2:00 AM in the morning, told his wife, “ Hectic day, sorry sweets…., Did you have your dinner ? “

He firmly moved his eyes off her, as she crossed the short path through the side of the flexi door to exit. He looked at the door again. She’s gone.

He could notice the drop of tears running in succession from the left corner of her eye. Her face was terrified; he could smell and sense horror. He wanted to wipe her tears, but just couldn’t. She held his right hand firm and tight. Won’t somebody help her? He looked around.

Careless attendants were walking, talking and listening to cricket scores over the small transistor radio. The attendant squealed, “S#$*! Sachin, again out on 99 ! “ , Run out !!!

He was cursing Sachin now, “How could he get so careless when he is just a run away from 1oo? “. Such haste. Who’s gonna come next? Dhoni, Yuvraj Singh, Pathan ? Sehwag is no use anyway…

The sound from the transistor faded now. He was staring at his sweetheart, she was still moaning. Now, he could see more blood from her lips.. Oozing. Someone, please wipe them off … His heart kept sinking. He quickly kissed her on her forehead; he didn’t know why he did that. But, he did it. She could hardly smile; she let out, a very weak and dry smile even in that terrible pain.

As he was struggling to wipe her tears, he could see one nurse piercing a needle through a hand. The syringe she withdrew now was filled with something that appeared like……. BLOOD. He saw blood trickling down the hands of the lady lying on the bed. He was about to fall, faint. He quickly withdrew consciousness.

It seemed Maroon in color, why do they call it Red Blood, then? Strange. Human mind is so fanatical. It still can afford to think ill logic in distress hours !

They were now near the door. The attendant from inside the room, made a screeching noise and opened the door. A small mouse, escaped through the door. He shockingly jumped up in the air. God, are they gonna take her inside THIS room? What was the rat running away from? Is there a CAT inside the room too? Even with seconds in his hand, before she was gone inside that room, he was searching for the cat inside.

The room inside was nauseating. Medicines, Bottles, Blood, Forceps, Scissors, Oxygen pipes and things he never saw before… Masked human beings! Does he know them? Who should he blame and curse tomorrow, if something happened today? He could hardly see them.

Yeah, I see, he told himself. One stout nurse, one slim one with a scissor in her hand, one attendant with a tray, one tall person, average height, green mask ! Ha! That’s enough! He consoled himself.

They now pushed him out of the room… “Sir, you must go now, please wait outside “, he tried to fight with them. She was now raising her head slowly and waving for him to come. The green masked person beckoned him to step closer. He ran towards the stretcher. She held his hand and he was close to her now.

He could hear her whisper. He thought he heard her say, “Don’t leave me”! What should he say now? “You stupid lady, you are the one who is in trouble, don’t you realize? “ or ……. He didn’t think any further, he kissed her again. He didn’t think at all. He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t. He had to leave. The attender now held his hand and he was out of the room.

He was pushed out. “ Hei, buddy, I am her husband !!!! “ he shouted. He shrugged. Doors closed. He could see a picture of a child hanging on the wall… one note was written on it… “ Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh” !!!!!!

9:53 am .............NOW
Seconds seemed like years.

RED BULB did not glow anymore. GREEN. He was impatient. The nurse came out and she led him inside.

What’s that pink stuff inside the white cloth next to his wife? What is it? He was restless. It moved. He was scared. He was very scared. His Wife now smiled at him.

He stepped inch on inch. He was now right next to the bed. There in the bed was the prettiest woman he had ever seen in his life and there ever could be. He never felt and saw her so beautiful. Ever. She seemed so, now.
Her left hand, gently moved over the white linen that was next to her. Nothing on this earth would have made him more heavenly than this moment. He grabbed the towel, it felt heavier now.

He saw now, crystal … IT’s a GIRL !




What exactly happened between 9:16 and 9:53 AM?

Anything that you might want to read, will either turn out to be a spoiler or an exaggeration. I am either mean or I suffer from inabilities in not being able to express the true emotions of a Father, whose heart beats for his loving wife and kid, and that of a Mother, whose feelings I cannot express.

I AM SORRY.

The heat from yesterday

Funny, Funnier, Funniest

For those of you who experienced the heat of yesterday’s debacle over the, over discussed sensitive issue. He wouldn’t forgive himself for carrying that all over his head until his bed.

Nightmares! ;)

Lightning.

He got into the bus last evening (time and route number immaterial here) and found only two seats available in the entire bus. The last 6 seater and a middle 3 seater. Dang !

Ladies! Women! Girls!

He had to choose between the two.
1) Two ladies in the 6th or 7th row of the bus. One occupying the window seat and the other the corner seat.
2) A guy on one side and a girl on the other side in the last row, supplemented with a free roller coaster jump ride on every bump in Hosur Road.

For option (2), you never know. By the time you get off the bus, you are already cramped like a MUMMY in some Egyptian exploration site !

The six Seater with SIX people is a total risk that you can afford. Specially, even if one healthy person ( please do not consider this offensive) sits there, God help you.

Also, he wasn’t willing to have a juice mixer run in his intestine for the ultimate mixing of the sandwich and the fresh Juice he had devoured minutes back.
Too early for output processing… Butterflies ? Snakes… Man. There were Vipers in his stomach!

He walked quietly ( did he have an option ? ) and just when he was about to request the lady to move inside, she said, “ please “ and wanted him to sit between the two. The lady sitting next to the window, lets out one lightening smile ( Oh my God ! She has read the posts in BB! )

Double trouble.

His Mind started racing badly. What should he do now ? Should he tell her ? Should he take the seat ? Should he take the other seat ? If he did, how will it look ? If he did not, how will it get ? Should he tell her politely ? Should he not tell her at all and just wave his hand to get her to occupy the middle seat ?

Hmmm. Difficult. Very difficult ( He recollected the scene when Harry Potter wanted to be in Griffindor, but he was fit for being in Slytherin ! )

Needless to say, he chose option 1.

He sat between them, and the next 45 – 60 minutes of his life, was thorny.

They usually say, “How long a minute is, depends on which side of the bathroom you are in”!

For the first time, he felt, it was true..He told himself, “IT WAS TRUE AFTER ALL!”

He recollected his dad tell him when he was a kid, “ It is good to watch Tom and Jerry blowing their heads off; It is actually difficult being one of them in that Cartoon” ! True, very true.

To his panic, due to the evening showers, the bus moved slow.. he could see it, the ANT that he saw near E-City junction was overtaking the bus now ! He could recognize it.

He kept whispering and praying to himself. “Dear God, if I get off this bus, without any trouble, I will break 10 coconuts! “

Suddenly, he felt it, a snake crawling over him. Something touched his hand. He froze. A chill ran down his spine. A drop of sweat ran over his temple [recollect here, the scene from Mission Impossible]

He slowly moved, lest it might gnaw him.

The string of the ID Card ! Whew………………….. !!!

He was feeling very sleepy. Every time he felt his eyes drooping, he wished he had an alarm set to make him sit tight. MUMMY’s Position. A long day at work and no time to relax. His Gray matter warned him, “Keep your eyes open, Keep it Open” !

Alas! He dozed off for 5 minutes and woke up with a start. God.. God… God !!!

ID CARD! Oh my God. Should I take it off now? Or Should I put it inside my shirt pocket?

He cursed that idiot who caused all this trouble. “Why me? , He whimpered to himself “ !

He just cautiously turned to see the girl sitting to the left of him. She was sleeping. Calm. Peace. A complete peaceful sleep. Or was she really sleeping? He didn’t know.

His bus stop. Ok, now what?

Should he wake her up ? But how ? Or should he wait until she gets off the bus ? He slowly moved and she looked at him. He gave a dry smile and told her, “ My stop”.

That perhaps was the craziest moment of his life, he thought. He knew. He felt like a Jackass!

He ran, ran and ran. Got down.

He breathed once and he felt maybe it was the first time after 65 minutes of mummified posture that he did.

Fresh air.

At last.
Sd/
Yuva